“Is your role to keep the child busy and entertained? Or is it to show them life skills and teach them to work together?” My key takeaways: ## Train Helpfulness But toddlers aren’t helpful? Yes, they won’t be helpful but you’re laying a foundation and teaching. It’s a sacrifice but good things require sacrifice. Even though they can be very unhelpful it is key to never discourage. Even if they erase all your progress If a task is too difficult, tell them to watch. Value the child’s contribution regardless of the positive impact. Some actually helpful things you can have them do include: - Go fetch - Hold this - Stir this - Carry this - Give love to someone - Clean clean clean Encourage the helpfulness not by praise but by pointing it out. “You are really starting to learn to be helpful”. Stop punishment and rewards for chores. It’s just part of being a member of the family. No more, no less. To make them feel fulfilled when not giving rewards the child should feel: - like they are making the choice to do the task and no one is forcing them - Like they are competent and their contribution is valued If things aren’t going well resist the urge to correct the child. Don’t repeatedly ask. The child knows what you want and you should let the, take lead. If they don’t, that’s okay too. ## Maximize Exposure to the Adult WORLD Don’t be afraid to take them to non kid friendly places like grocery stores, doctors office, banks, post office. Anywhere, really. ## Anger and Tantrums ![[image.jpg]] If you want a child to be quiet and calm, you just be quiet and calm. To change behaviors you can use these strategies: - The look - Consequence puzzle - Instead of a command, use a question “who is being mean” - redirect to responsibility - Give an action - Put on a puppet show - Bring a problem to the play zone ![[image 1.jpg]]